Yikes! The aftermath of Steven Tyler’s shower-fall in Paraguay this week.
In the seemingly never-ending “Steven Tyler has fallen and he can’t get up” news, here is a photo of the aftermath of Tyler’s latest misadventure that didn’t involve Joe Perry, but a shower in Paraguay. The fall cost Tyler two teef, stitches, and a nasty shiner. And naturally, the rumors that Tyler’s fall was caused by Tyler falling off the sobriety wagon, have been rampant.
Tyler maintains that he is, and has been, stone cold sober since entering a treatment program after his last relapse, and that food poisoning and dehydration caused him to pass out in the shower in his hotel. Tyler said he woke up with “with the water running on me, not knowing where the hell I was.”
The incident caused Aerosmith to postpone their show in Paraguay until yesterday, so a dentist could put two new dental implants into Tyler’s mouth.
Steven Tyler shows off his shiner as he and Joe Perry take the stage together in Paraguay yesterday.
Even grumpy old Admiral Perry was quick to give Tyler praise for taking the stage a day later in Paraguay after being treated for his fall. Perry tweeted that “Steven even played harp with his busted lip my mind was blown. He put on one of his best shows ever. Aerosmith rocks on.”
In other news, (and with all due respect), is 63 too early to get one of those Life Alert bracelets? And if it’s not, do they have a waterproof/Joe Perry proof variety? According to their website, Life Alert is the only company proven to save lives from CATASTROPHE! And a world without Steven Tyler’s rock ‘n’ roll antics would be just that, a catastrophe! As well as leaving yours truly with nothing to live for, or blog about. Which would be bad for everyone me.
This one goes out to all you Axl Rose fans out there. It’s good to love the metal so much that you get her name tattooed on your back. But it’s not okay to misspell her name. Metal HATES that and will shank you in the face while screaming, “who the f*ck is Destrution?“, if you do. So please, next time you visit your local tattoo parlor, bring a dictionary for f*cks sake.
If you are a faithful reader of this blog, you know I have featured inky, forever versions of Steven Tyler before. With Tyler’s success on American Idol, I figured it would only be a matter of time before more ink-loving Aerosmith enthusiasts started getting Tyler’s mug engraved on their skin. Turns out, I was right.
Steven Tyler “American Idol” leg tattoo.
This tattoo gives new meaning to the Dream On lyrics “All these lines in my face getting clearer.” In other news, Steven Tyler tattoo is looking at you, kid.
Steven Tyler in black and white. YIKES!
This black and white tatt of Tyler brings to mind yet more lyrics from Dream On. “Sing for the tears!” At least the artist nailed the tattoo of the tattoo on Tyler’s arm. Unfortunately, a decent tattoo of a tattoo on a bad tattoo, can’t make a bad tattoo look good.
Steven Tyler, the mad hatter. The tattoo.
I don’t know what’s going on with Tyler’s right tattooed eyeball, but it’s freaking me out. Anyway, now we’re up to date on the world of Steven Tyler tattoo’s. In other news, I’d like to extend my apologies to your eyeballs, as well as Steven Tyler. All three of you deserve better.
A Dutch brewery has one-upped Brew Dog’s impossibly boozy 55% beer (served up road-kill style) with a brew called, Start the Future. Start The Future boasts a liver-churning 60%(or 120 proof) alcohol content, PER BOTTLE. The price tag? $45 for .333 liters.
IggyPop getting ready to pay the audience a visit…
Hey New York,
How is it that you so many of you so called “New Yorkers” forgot that when Iggy Popjumps into the audience at a live show, YOU CATCH HIM! For chrissake Igg only weighs about 100lbs. Even when he’s covered entirely in glitter! What is wrong with you people? Is it because you’re chasing your light beer with Ambien instead of Tequila these days? Dang New York, and I always thought you were so cool. My bad.
Anyway, here’s what the reigning King of Punk had to say about the incident that took place last month at Carnegie Hall:
When I landed it hurt and I made a mental note that Carnegie Hall would be a good place for my last stage dive. The audience were just like, ‘What are you doing?’”
Luckily, (and unlike his rock ‘n’ roll counterpart Steven Tyler, both aged 62 & 63 respectively), Iggy suffered only bruises when the Carnegie crowd actually “parted” and allowed Igg to face plant on the floor. Nice.
Misspelled, poorly translated Latin tattoo’s are forever…
This tattoo was supposed to be the Latin translation of Samuel L. Jackson’s famous Pulp Fiction“Ezekiel 25:15” speech just before he blows a bunch of holes in Brett. The translation not only includes English text (the word “of” appears twice) but, it also contains a couple of typos due to the fact that owner probably plugged the quote into an online translation service then happily went off to see the first tattoo artist he could find. Nice job, Johnny.