In keeping with the consensus that there is not such thing as Aerosmith without Steven Tyler, the band is scheduled to appear at the massive Download Festival in the UK in June under one condition, that Steven Tyler and onlySteven Tyler appear with the band. Tyler, who despite making appearances at and Karaoke barsandHome Depot, is still in rehab, released this statement confirming that he will perform with Aerosmith at Download:
In the early days of Aerosmith, we were infected with the vibe coming out of the U.K. with the Yardbirds, Blues Breakers, Pretty Things and the Rolling Stones, and we wanted what they had bad. So baby, we’re coming home. Rock and roll can be pure sex and we can’t wait to Download …
The Download Festival kicks off on June 11th at Donington Park. Take that Joe Perry.
The March issue of Men’s Health Magazine contains a list of the most drunk cities in the US. Seattle was given a C+ for our current level of intoxication. For SHAME! Although we did one-up Spokane(C) and flat out beat Portland (D+), there is clearly room for improvement my fellow Emerald City boozehounds.
The biggest shocker on the list was that Boston received the dubious honor of being the “least drunk city”. SACRILEG! Although Boston’s sober status kind of makes sense since I don’t live there anymore.
The study based their findings on uplifting data such as death rates from alcoholic liver disease, booze-induced accidents involving motor vehicles, hospitalizations due to binge-drinking, and DUI arrests.
To see where your city ended up on the list, click here.
In a lengthy interview with Britt Rock Magazine Classic Rock, Joe Perry continued to mystify the world of rock ‘n’ roll with his bizarre list of singers who he says could possibly replace Steven Tyler at the helm of Aerosmith. The latest victim is 69 year old Tom Jones. Said (yawn)The Perry:
He’s got a great set of pipes, so why not? I’ve played with him before, and know he could bring something extra to the band. We haven’t approached him yet, but if he were interested that would be great. Imagine the interest Tom would generate.
Last weeks Aerosmith rumor mill also included the horrifying notion that Sammy Hagarmight step in while Tyler is on hiatus. As if we all didn’t suffer enough with over a decade of Van Hagar. Oi!
The latest issue of Classic Rock, The Last Days of an American Rock Legend featuring Joe Perry on the cover, is out now.
…which is weird since pretty much anyone that follows Aerosmith(including the fans living in their vans down by the river) knows that Steven Tyler is currently in rehab and is due to undergo surgery on his feet and knees in the very near future. The surgery will potentially keep out of commission for close to a year. Anyway, here’s Perry’s“get better soon” shout out to his band mate and friend of nearly 40 years:
I don’t know what’s going on with him, but as far as AEROSMITH goes, we’re going to find somebody to sing.
Not that I expected Perry to be sending Steven Tyler a Build-a-Bear in a doctor outfit and a box of chocolates laced with Percocet, but even my black heart yelled “BOO!” at Perry’s latest “Steven Tyler who?” comments. Later during Perry’s interview with Canadian publication, The Globe and Mail, hewas asked whohe thought might be able to wiggle into Tyler’s size zero spandex. Perry responded saying he would only consider a performer that is “legitimate (sorry Josh Todd) headliner”.
You can read Perry’s full interview with The Globe and Mail, here.
Tyler’s doctor Brian McKeon says that in addition the current treatment for his painkiller addiction, Tyler will also need additional surgery for his knees and feet in the near future. McKeon said that despite tapping into other types of treatment and alternative therapy to help heal the forever frontman of Aerosmith, Tyler’s pain has become worse…:
The balance between managing his pain and avoiding addiction is tenuous and difficult and his bravery in persevering through rigorous touring is admirable.
Steven Tyler issued a statement today saying that he will be heading to rehab to kick his dependence on pain killers. For once, I’m not going to make any crass jokes because while this news comes as relief for Tyler, his family and his fans, it’s also pretty sad. Says Tyler:
With the help of my family and team of medical professionals, I am taking responsibility for the management of my pain and am eager to be back on the stage. I love Aerosmith; I love performing as the lead singer in Aerosmith. I am grateful for all of the support and love I am receiving and am committed to getting things taken care of.
Despite Tyler and Aerosmith’s historical fucked-up-ness, it’s worth wondering aloud if Tyler would have found himself in this position again if he hadn’t injured himself so severely this past summer. At any rate, I just want my Motherfucking Rainbow healthy, clean and back where he belongs. Fronting Aerosmith.
Ted Williams Gun Cabinets. Approved by Ted Williams. From page 1202 of the 1974 Sears Fall/Winter Catalog.
This week’s Sears ‘74 is a nostalgic doozy for yours truly. Growing up in Boston, I idolized (and still do) the Boston Red Sox(yes, really), and routinely prayed at the Church of Ted Williams, one of the greatest baseball players of all time. After Williams left the Sox to pursue other sports related ventures, he got into bed with Sears and created a line of various Guns. More specifically, shotguns.
Ted’s Shotgun line for Sears included but was not limited to the single-shot, double barrel, 12-gauge, semi-automatic and pump-action shotguns just to name a few. Of course, all those guns needed somewhere safe to hang out, so Ted also created a signature line of Gun Cabinets for Sears, pictured above.
You can see some of Ted’s Over-and-Under boom-sticks after the jump…
I’ve been meaning to remind you all that Episode #44 of The Movies About Girls Podcast is up and ready for your ears. Among other topics, you will learn why you why you shouldn’t try to pay your drug dealer with deodorant, the horror (and the goodness) of pink panties and, the virtues of Danny Trejo and babysitters gone bad.
Want more? Joining the best podcast ever for Episode #44 is XXX expert, Gore Gore Girl with her run down on the top five porn releases of the week. If you just said “what?”, you might want to check your pulse. Also, Joey Sinn and Mike Demonik of Boston Metal band Born of Thunder are back with insight on leather pants, Metal and fast cars. What more could you possibly want from a from a podcast? That’s right, boobs. I mean, NOTHING! Okay, andboobs. Thankfully, The Movies About Girls Podcast is an expert on that very topic.
You can listen to Episode #44here or click the podcast link on the right of this page. You can also now follow The Movies About Girls Podcast on Twitter! If you like what you hear, go out and vote for us at Podcast Alley and help us defeat the evil corporate sponsored podcasts that litter PA’s top 50 list.
A lot of work goes into making this podcast happen and, I want to thank to Ken, Seth, and Stacey for making it all happen.
J. Geils Band, Piss on the Wall. From 1981’s Freeze Frame. For Mike, Sarah and LP.
I was at a very boss Holiday party on Saturday, boozing happily while plotting illegal rides in stolen shopping carts when the couch conversation shifted it’s way early days of the Boston rock scene. Highlights included, but were not limited to Aerosmith, Willie Loco Alexander and the loud conclusion (thanks Mike) that J. Geils 1971 version of The Contours hit “First I Look At The Purse“ is one of the hottest covers ever.
Anyway, since that magical night, I’ve had this song from Geils’ huge 1981 record, Freeze Frame, stuck in my head. Now hopefully you do too.
In yet another wrinkle in the ongoing saga of the future of Aerosmith, Geffen record executive John Kalodner was quoted saying that the only person that could possibly replace Steven Tyler is Lenny Kravitz. After he regained consciousness following his massive brain fart, Kalodoner qualified his statement saying that there there is no such thing as Aerosmith“without Steven Tyler“. Aerosmith put out three of their most commercially successful records with Geffen, starting with their 1985 “comeback” record, Done With Mirrors.
Meanwhile, somewhere in the woods of New Hampshire, Joe Perry just got an idea. An awful idea. Joe Perry got a wonderful, awful, idea…
Just a quick note on this weeksSear’s ‘74 entry as this photo is giving me a case of the bed-spins. And sadly (and quite unbelievably) I’m not drunk. If the chick modeling item #1, the footed two-piece erection killing sleepwear, looks as though like you might have masturbated to her before, you would be correct. As well as somewhat pathetic and very lonely.
Posy sleepwear model #1 from page 177 of the Fall/Winter 1974 Sears Catalog, is actress Shelly Hack. Hack is probably best known for her brief role on Charlie’s Angels. Hack’s fictional Bostonian, Tiffany Wells became Charlie’s #5 Angel, replacing Kate Jackson for one season in 1980.
More polyester blend madness from Sears next Wednesday that will absolutely! may or may not involve Ted Williams, guns and/or He-Man chairs. Stay tuned…
Despite claims made by Steven“The Motherfucking Rainbow”Tyler during a Joe Perry Project show in New York, Joe Perry said last night at the AMA’s that he is moving forward with plans to keep Aerosmith going. With or without Steven Tyler. Yawn, I mean, said The Perry:
The band’s going to be working with or without Tyler. I’m working on it right now.
Mind you, this is coming from Perry as he walked the red carpet last night at the American Music Awardslooking like this. Perry’s latest comments follow statements of concern for Tyler’s current state of sobriety made by Aerosmith drummer Joey Kramer last week.
Despite his past struggles with substances, after looking at these photos of Tyler at a Parkinson’s Disease Benefit this past weekend in New York, I’m not quite ready to stage an intervention for The Motherfucking Rainbow. Yet, anyway. I would however like to stage an intervention for Joe Perry’s mouth. His lips have been on a bullshit bender since August.
Joey Kramer and Steven Tyler make nice for the cameras…
At a signing for his new book, Hit Hard: The Story of Hitting Rock Bottom at the Top, Aerosmith drummer Joey Kramer seemed to be siding with Team Perry regarding the ongoing 70’s Rock hissy-fit of 2009, otherwise known as Aerosmith. Said Joey(which if you take away the “y” suspiciously spells Joe) about the type of musician that might be able to replace Steven Tyler:
What kind of singer? A real, real good one. Someone that would have to be able to perform the songs as well as sing them. Steven is both of those and probably the best out there.
Steven, he isolates more and more all the time – that’s what gives it away to me that there’s something going on. He’s got some negative influences around him now. I love the guy. I just want to see him get some help.
When it comes to the struggles with the bad shit, Joey Kramer pretty much knows what he’s talking about. Which is good news for Joey Kramer, butprobably maybe really bad news for Steven Tyler.
Ken Ober has passed away at the age of 52. Sadness…
If you had a pulse and you regularly paid your cable bill back in the late 80’s and early 90’s, you will remember Ken Ober as the host of MTV’s game show, Remote Control. On Saturday, Ober told a friend he was experiencing flu-like symptoms and was planned to see his doctor as soon as possible. He was found dead in his California home on Sunday.
I am the motherfucking RAINBOW! Steven Tyler joins The Joe Perry Project last night in New York and confirmed to the crowd that he is not leaving Aerosmith.
Steven Tyler arrives at the Glamour Woman of the Year Awards in New York.
Last night, Joe Perry once again took to his Twatter to assure members of AeroForce One that Aerosmith was not breaking up. Sez The Perry:
Aerosmith is definitely NOT breaking up … one of the members is doing his own thing and said so in the press.
Unfortunately what this means (according to Perry) isthat the band plans to continue playing as Aerosmithwithout Tyler at the helm.
Aerosmith is positively looking for a new singer to work with. You just can’t take 40 years of experience and throw it in the bin,” he wrote. “[The] band is playing hotter than ever and our songs need to be played live. Don’t despair: Aerosmith is not splitting up. Promise that’s the last you’ll hear from me on the subject ’till we gear up again.
Don’t despair? What kind of sacrilegious shit is this? Honestly, the only thing I’m really despairing is a band called Aerosmith with anyone but Steven Tyler on vocals. True story.
Cherrybombed.com is about the music and culture of the Pacific Northwest, as well as other cool happenings around the world. We also shine a spotlight on celebrities behaving badly. Here, you will find videos, low-brow artwork and images, and tattoos only a mother could hate.
If boozing was an olympic event, we would be on a box of Wheaties. If this all sounds familiar to you (and your mother), welcome home.
