Liquid Ass. $7.75.  For AFJ.

Liquid Ass provides a powerful stinky ass smell that can last hours. The Liquid ASS mister bottle provides a punch of instant ASS smell.

More via the Liquid Ass website.

Alex Pardee, Pigtails, 2009.

Alex Pardee’s biggest solo show to date (and his last solo gig for a while),“Hiding From The Normals”, opens tonight at GALLERY 1988 in LA. Pardee is never one to disappoint with his creations back stories, and Hiding is no exception. For this show, Pardee will take us down the rabbit hole of a madman who recently went missing . Sez Pardee:

The entire show is based off of the beliefs of a man who recently went missing in real life. The man was a supposed crackpot and believes that there is another world living under ours filled with mutants. It is not known if this man is still alive or not. This show is going to be my LAST solo show for over a year. I will be participating in a few group shows, but 2010 is going to be full of some different kind of adventures:) Stay tuned.

More details on Hiding and an artist I truly enjoy spreading the word about, Alex Pardee, here.

Buffalo Tom, Summer. From 1995’s Sleepy Eyed.

I know you don’t really want to believe that summer is pretty much done. But like you, I’m still in denial of that sad fact so I spent the day at the beach, marveling at the surf kicked up by Hurricane Danny, wishing that the lyrics to from Buffalo Tom’s song Summer weren’t so timely.

In two days, it’s going to be September. Summer’s gone, it’s written in the sand.

*Programming note: Posts will be slow tomorrow as I’ll be traveling back to Seattle so read the archives! There’s some good shit in there.*

Reasons #1-10 as to why you should not give up drinking. For LP.

Vintage liquor discrimination ad: FAIL.

Tactical Bacon.

What’s better than approximately 55 slices of bacon in a can with a shelf life of 10 years? Tactical Bacon’s “life without the product” pitch, that’s what…:

How many times have you been driving down the road and just need a fix? Just a little bit of bacon to get you through? Now you can keep a can in you car, a can at work, and can in you gym bag.

Will the summer of bacon being in everything never end?

Glen Beck invents words on live TV.

I usually wouldn’t give face time to someone like Glen Beck. The man is a tool. A man-tool that trusts too much in his unpaid interns. However, Beck’s latest gaffe, captured in the video above, is total straight-jacket material. It also makes it safe to assume that Glen Beck probably cheats at scrabble. I don’t doubt that Beck was behind this abuse of the English language all along, however, that would lead you to believe that I BELIEVE Glen Beck CAN SPELL!

I give you OLIGARHY. A word made up by Glen Beck. During the broadcast of his national television show. Mr. Murdoch, the ball is in your court.

Harbio Maoam.

The happy people at candy fun maker Harbio have been making the fruity concoction called Maoam for seven years now. Recently a man in West Yorkshire complained that the fruit on the Maoam package seemed to be in the throws of copulation, saying in his complaint:

The lime, whom I assume to be the gentleman in this coupling, has a particularly lurid expression on his face

You know, for candy made in Germany, the cherries are not as lurid as I had hoped. Anyway, more on Harbio here.

Source: WOW.

The Pickle.

The Pickle. The Tattoo. The balls.

Exeter Docks, Exeter, New Hampshire.

How is summer almost over?

Mickey Rourke leaving a London strip club last night.

Grrrrrr!

Mr. Windmill. For JB.

Pete Townshend recently told the Guardian UK that he is working on a musical called “Floss”. Says the 64 years young guitar slinger:

Floss is an ambitious new project for me, in the style of Tommy and Quadrophenia. In this case the songs are interspersed with surround-sound ’soundscapes’ featuring complex sound effects and musical montages.

Read more on Townshend via his excellent blog.

Bob Dylan, knows all the streets by name.

Talk about Street Legal! Bob Dylan just might be the next voice on your GPS system.

To read the rest of the story, click here.

The Maldives, Listen to the Thunder, 2009.

The Maldives three-night record release stint at The Tractor Tavern starts tonight! Here’s the lineup:

Thursday, August 27th:
North Twin
19th Chapter

Friday, August 28th:
The Moondoggies
Zoe Muth & The Lost High Rollers

Saturday, August 29th:
Thee Emergency
Shim
Pickwick

More on The Maldives here.

10 year old Japanese girl rocks out the Kansas tune “Carry On My Wayward Son” at a piano recital.

YES!

Thanks!: RDK. Feel better baby.

David Lynch goes solo at the Griffin…

David Lynch will hold his first solo art show in over a decade in LA in September at the Griffin in Santa Monica. The show will feature Lynch’s large scale works. The show runs September 12 – December 12th, 2009.

More on the deviant deliciousness that is David Lynch, here.

The battle for billboard supremacy. Jesus vs. McDonalds.

Behold the beefy, cheesy glory of Jesus!

Michael is that you?

The person who took this video…hold on a minute. Let me rephrase that. The CRAZY person behind the release of this video claims that it clearly shows Michael Jackson exiting the LA Coroner’s van sans body bag. Translation, Michael Jackson is still alive! Which makes perfect sense to anyone who eats crack rocks for breakfast. They stay crispy in milk you know.

Source: Dlisted.

This is the Cloaca a machine. It makes poo!

You could once actually buy some of the shit that the Cloaca churns out. Sadly (and shockingly I might add), all of the Cloaca caca is sold-out.

More on the Cloaca shit-machine here.

I told you Gary Busey had business ideas! For Jane.

It looks like Gary Busey’s business ideas weren’t really that crazy after all. Optimize your business with Busey!

Fox News billboard. For Freddy Pants.

Word.

*Programming Note: Sorry for the slow posts today. I’m suffering from a king-size hangover, courtesy of Freddy Pants and Lupo of Lupo’s*