Arrrrrgggg! I’m delicious and full of potassium! For Jane.

Thanks: YesButNoButYes.

Helmut Lang window display at Barneys in NYC. For Stacey.

I guess high-end retailer Barneys is trying to make the point that a dress by designer Helmut Lang is in fact good enough to be caught dead in.

Additional photos and the full story here.

Rock Star Hand by Moon Light Aura. For LP.

I could spend a whole week on Esty and still not see anything I want. Until I found Rock Star Hand that is.

Legless Yellow Bikini Girl tattoo.

So many things to say, none of them nice. And don’t bother trying to claw your eyes out, it won’t help.

For more horrible tattoos, click here.

Punk rock condom. Love hurts…

Erco, a Czechoslovakian company (also known as Wacky Rubbers) makes hand painted, novelty condoms. Some of Erco’s condoms have also have LED lights and musical features that activate when the condom is in, ahem, use.

Number 60, The Hand condom by Wacky Rubbers.

The Hand, the condom. ‘Nuff said.

Straight from the condom dispenser in Hell it’s, uh, shit! I don’t know what the hell that thing is!

All the condoms from Erco are hand painted. The one above is one of Erco’s “Special” condoms, specifically made for the large condom connoisseur. Anyway, is it me, or does the face on this condom (face on a condom…shudder) also remind you of the Blue Meanies! from Yellow Submarine?

Want to see more Wacky Rubbers? Check out this video of Erco’s condoms in action (sort of SFW). Lastly, since Easter is right around the corner, better stock up on Wacky Rubbers Easter themed condoms. Jesus would want you to.

Paul Stanley KISS painting.

In 2007 Paul Stanley made over $2 million dollars (not a typo) from the sale of his art.

One of the three new Paul Stanley paintings, Dream Catcher.

If you’re in the cultural epicenters of Hackensack or Short Hills, New Jersey tomorrow you can catch Stanley as he unveils three new paintings at the Wentworth Gallery. There will be VIP sessions held with Stanley at each Gallery, click here for details.

Blow-Up Doll Jacket by Mama Anders Design.

Netherlands based designer Sanders Reijgers, uses blow-up dolls as artistic material, like the jacket in the photo above. Says Reijgers:

I customize existing tracksuit tops with parts of the blow-up dolls – the head, the breasts, the vagina, the anus. I remove the sexual function of the dolls by turning them into a jacket or a bag. In this way, the doll can ‘feel’ by performing a normal day-to-day task, rather than through sex.

You can see more of the Reijgers designs on his Myspace or here.

Natacha Stellmach, Gone. Kurt goes up in smoke?

Australian artist, Natacha Stellmach is claiming she will smoke some of the late Kurt Cobain’s ashes in her upcoming exhibition, Set Me Free. Stellmach’s installation at the Wagner + Partner Gallery in Berlin focuses  on suicide and desecration. Stellmach has said the smoking of Cobain’s ashes will “finally release him into ether.” Meanwhile, somewhere in Los Angeles, Courtney is kicking herself not for not thinking of this first.

Wendy is taped and ready for the weekend…are you?

…is the day we should all start drinking heavily, straight through ’til November. And mostly, you should go somewhere other than your couch to do it. Unless that couch is getting you laid. If that is in fact the case, carry the fuck on. All curse words aside, I’m completely confused about how to misuse my vote. I filled out my absentee ballot and then ripped it up. Anyways, lets get back to talking about what’s really important. Rock and Roll, baby…and we’re off:

Thursday, February 7th:

Ms. Led has got the right idea…

Ms. Led
Pris
The Sunset
Ms. Led tells it like it is. Their music is angry and urgent with lyrics that will shake you awake. If they don’t, then you, sir, are dead.

Hobo Libido
Club Fuel
HL has a new track up on their Myspace site called “Love Cow“. Ding dang it’s pretty sweet. And it has cowbell in it, just as a song called Love Cow should. The beginning of the song made me think of both Thin Lizzy and Mountain at the same time. Which under normal circumstances, would have made that 70’s side of my brain explode. Fortunately, normal circumstances and Cherrybomb rarely intersect on the road of rock and roll. Phew…

Friday, February 8th:

No Fi Soul Rebellion like apples…

Cancer Rising
No Fi Soul Rebellion
Comet Tavern
No Fi is yet another band putting Bellingham, Washington on the map. And whoever is booking Cancer Rising is a fucking genius. And no, it’s not me, but I can totally see how you might have thought it might have been.

Saturday, February 9th:

Ellen Forney Book Launch & Art Exhibition
Fantagraphics (Georgetown location)
Forney’s work is known to you if you read The Stranger. The back of The Stranger mostly. Don’t act like you don’t read The Stranger back pages. Everyone reads those back pages. Okay, everyone for sure LOOKS at the back pages. Sticky back pages. Oh, I almost forgot to tell you…TS Tina called for you when you were out. In other super art girl news, lens-mistress Lilly Warner is showing her photos of Seattle’s own SSP at the Cafe Venus and Mars Bar through February 29th.

Shim (and Dita Vox’s Mohawk). Photo by Cherrybombed.

Shim (CD Release)
Tractor Tavern
Shim’s follow-up to the sweet release In the Veins, “Feel Like a King” is out tonight. The last time I saw Shim, I loved them as much as the first time I saw them. Bring earplugs and your love for dry ice.

OVO is Italian for hardcore…

Lesbian
OvO (Italy)
Vera Project
Lesbian and OvO on a Saturday night? Okay, to be fair, OvO is from Italy and sounds like something from a Dario Argento movie, so maybe you never heard of ‘em. I’ll let you slide this one time, but next time, man…knuckle Lesbian sandwich for you.

Looking Ahead…:

Rufus Wainwright will be at The Paramount on March 13th. I’m ashamed to say I was only slightly aware of Rufus until recently. If you are Rufus ignorant like Cherrybomb see the Leonard Cohen doc, “I’m Your Man”. The doc’s approach is a little unconventional but the performances (that include the likes of Nick Cave and Beth Orton) are completely stellar. Wainwright’s version of Cohen’s “Hallelujah” will make you a fan if you aren’t one already.

Jamie Nova of Hell’s Belles and Witchburn

Ministry is at The Showbox on March 29th. I lost my shoes at a Ministry show once. I never liked those shoes anyway but I still love Ministry. I like my rock hard and fast or I want no rock at ALL. Hell’s Belles has two shows on February 23rd at Hell’s Kitchen in Tacoma. All ages at 3:00 (!) and 21+ at 9:00. Vocalist Jamie Nova’s other band, Witchburn (who are so excellent) will be at El Corazon on Wednesday, February 13th.

See you out there…

Sounds like a weekend to me. I don’t know about you but I’m planning on starting the weekend tonight. You do what you want. Although I think what you want to do is also what I want you to do so I guess I’ll drunk you there…:

Wednesday, January 30th:
The Central’s 17th Annual Tattoo Contest
Yes, please.

Thursday, January 31st:
Johnny Horn spins at The War Room
I listen to Johnny every Sunday without fail. The War Room is deluxe no matter what night you hit it. So hit it already.

MGMT. My little brothers just discovered Funk & Roll.

Black Mountain and MGMT are at Neumo’s. This bill is so on. It’s electric in all the right ways. Right now I am totally crushing out on MGMT’s Electric Feel. If you like Curtis Mayfield and Prince then you will love Electric Feel. Wait…I said “if” as if it’s possible not like Curtis Mayfield and/or Prince. My mistake. Put on Electric Feel, and for sure you are getting lucky in that back seat this Saturday. Even if you’re alone.

The Warriors – 1979
The Grand Illusion Cinema
Last day to see the week long big screen run of the 70’s cult classic.

Saturday, February 2nd:
Buttorock Suites
The Triple Door (Two shows – 7:30 and 10:00)
Buttrock is like 1986 in a bottle that got shook up and exploded all over your spandex pants.

Looking ahead:

The Gates of Paradise, Ghiberti’s Renaissance Masterpiece is at SAM.

The Gates of Paradise – Ghiberti 1452

I love anything from the Renaissance. Caravaggio’s Head of John the Baptist is one of Cherrybomb’s favorites from the era. For the first time in over 500 years, Lorenzo’s Ghiberti’s “Gates of Pardise” (above) will be on display. It took 25 years for Ghiberti to create the three panels in this exhibit. Roman Art from the Louvre opening weekend at SAM begins Friday, February 21st. And while we are speaking of art…

Dawn Cerny just opened an exhibit last weekend at Henry Art Gallery:

Holy Art school girl crush. I love Dawn Cerny.

Cerny’s “We’re all going to die (except for you)” runs through April 27th.

The 2007 releases from both The Cops and Kinski (below) were on Cherrybomb’s local top ten list last year. The Cops will also take a trip to SXSW this year.

Kinski takes a walk in the woods…

See them both at Neumo’s on Tuesday, February 5th. DJ Shadow and Cut Chemist are at The Showbox at the Market on Sunday, February 10th. Cherrybomb’s advice? You are totally calling in sick that Monday.

Studio 7 will host Ska Fest on February 8th with The Diablotones and Natalie Wouldn’t (slew of other bands. Check it). The Diablotones have been around. And after jawing about it for a while, are back to playing Ska the way it sounds best. Live. Ska show are fun because fans at Ska shows actually move around like they are alive. Enough with the Seattle head-bobbing. Move it sucka’. You ain’t dead yet. And while we’re on that Latin tip, have you seen American Sabor at EMP yet?

The Blakes like shiny things…

The Blakes are back in Seattle and will bring their instruments and their awesome hair to Chop Suey on Friday, February 15th. Catfish Haven (Chicago) are at and Nectar on Tuesday, February 19th. CH’s George Hunter likes to sing about hangovers. Which makes sense since his voice sounds like it’s been hanging out with Johnny Walker. A lot.

The Bug Nasties – The High Dive January 30th

The Bug Nasties at The Blue Moon on Friday, February 15h. The last time I saw The Bug Nasties, Brother James (above right) actually became James Brown for at least ten full minutes. And he wears nice shoes. Men should do that more. God bless Brother James and his sweet, sweet shoes.

A Gun that Shoots Knives – Heaven’s House band…

A Gun that Shoots Knives (above) just released “Miracle” and you can only get it at their shows. Check out AGTSN and Thee Emergency at The Comet on Saturday, February 23rd. No Quarter/A Tribute to Led Zeppelin will also be in town at The Tractor on Saturday, February 23rd. Get your lighters out.

Gogol Bordello – Bumbershoot 2007

Gogol Bordello is coming back to Seattle on Monday, March 10th at The Showbox. This photo (above) is from their special acoustic performance in Seattle at Bumbershoot last year. Plugged in this band is even more raucous. Don’t worry though. Gogol won’t come for your children. Kids would cramp their wayward, New York lifestyle.

And finally, Tom Jones will bring his cool, come hither, classy old dude swagger (and a few of his banana hammocks) to The Paramount on May 30. Tickets are on sale now and Tom sells pretty much every seat in the house every time he comes through this way.

Tom says hi to your Mom…

I’ve never been a fan of saving the best for last . I mean what is “saving the best for last” all about anyway? Screw waiting. Give me that good shit now. That way, the vodka that comes in the plastic bottle on the bottom shelf won’t taste so bad later. Not that I ever drink that swill. Wait a minute…what were we talking about? Oh right…

I thought I would follow up my last post on drunk tattoos with one of the best tattoos I have ever seen. And by best I mean this tattoo of Bart Simpson makes my eyes bleed. And not just because I’m trying to claw my eyes after looking at it…:

I have never wanted to not see something more in my whole life. I’m also pretty sure this tattoo also serves as a potent chick repellent but then again, getting laid is not at the top of this guys list.

Uhhh…I got nothing. There is nothing this dude could say as to why he got this tatt that would make it okay. When I first saw it I thought it might be a PS job but then I saw the moles on Homer’s arm and shirt. And that’s exactly when I threw up a little (okay a lot) in my mouth.

Star Wars: A tattoo is Forever you Freak…:

There are whole sites dedicated to people with Star Wars tattoos. Here are just a few of the more hideous ones:

Fucking Wookie. Why? It looks more like an angry, hairy turd with eyes.

This one you might have seen before (above) as it’s been around. Or maybe this is the first time you saw it. If it is the first time you’ve see this then, you’re welcome.

Hello Kitty has it’s own category for this post but this Darth Vader Hello Kitty tattoo is right where she belongs. Which brings us logically to the Hello Kitty tattoo part of the entry:

Hello Kitty: Having a Hello Kitty tattoo makes you a total pussy.

So like I was saying, there is no shortage of Hello Kitty tattoos out there. Hello Kitty has a whole site dedicated to the madness and marketing that is the Hello Kitty empire. People are always coming up with mods to the original Hello Kitty image when it comes to tatts. Check out Cherrybomb’s current favorite, Hello Kitty Christ:

The bleeding holes on the paws of Hello Kitty Christ is classy but pales in comparison to the words “Is My Jesus“ on this Vic (above photo). I mean, if you love Hello Kitty and Jesus that much now, you will never regret getting a tatt like that. Right? And while I’m on the topic of never being regretful…

No way is she gonna regret that tattoo. Not in a million (five) years from now. Not now (okay, now). Not ever (five minutes after this photo was taken). Besides, regrets are for losers. And clearly, Miss Kitty (above) is no loser.

Food: There is not enough beer in the world…wait a minute. I guess there is.

You could fill a decent size book with photos of people with tats of FOOD. The ones that follow are just the tip of that demented culinary iceberg…:

I guess that’s a cheeseburger but I can’t really see the burger because it’s almost as green as what appears to be “lettuce” below it. The crown and the halo with the little candy corns floating above it are awesome though. I mean, this is high art. You know, something you saw when you were high and thought, “that is awesome“. But then, when you’re not high anymore and you have a tattoo of a cheeseburger with a crown, halo and floating candy corn on your arm or leg (not that it really matters but I can’t tell, can you?) things are not as awesome as they once seemed. Which brings me to the next photo:

So this is supposed to be an ode to the delicious combo of Za and Beer. The pizza in this tatt looks more like a couple of severed appendages. I’m also pretty sure the artist who did this tattoo was drunk when they did it. Or really mad at who ever they did it to. I mean, just looking at this tatt makes me feel drunk. Anyways, one last food item on the list here. And I guess I lied a little when I said I don’t like leaving the best for last…:

CORN! Corney-corn. Delicious, genetically modified corn. Cornholio. Okay, I’m done.

Prada “belt”. Fall Collection, Milan – 2008

Or is it dead men wear tutu’s? Or maybe they’re just dead on the inside…I don’t know. Anyways, before you go getting your man panties all in a bind, I know a real man wouldn’t wear a real tutu. But, according to Prada, this is a photo of a man, wearing a belt that only looks like a tutu. And he appears to be very much alive. At least on the outside so that’s okay. Right? Right. Moving on…

Jil Sander Fall 2008 Men’s Collection

Wow. The 80’s really are back.

Gauliter Fall Mens Wear Paris 2008

Bill Boy and his three droogs work the catwalk. Not a lot of work for droogs these days. Times are tough.

Alexander McQueen Fall Mens Wear Milan 2008

Are you thinking what I’m thinking? ‘Cause I don’t know what to think now so I was kinda hoping you might be able to help me out. Anyways, I have a strange overwhelming urge to vacuum my rug now so I gotta go.

Dr. Cube and his perfect monster smack down…

Screw the Cloverfield monster. And although I have it on rather expert authority that Cloverfield was good (not great), Kaiju is where it’s at. Kaiju is basically your favorite Godzilla movie come to life, Steel Cage wrestling death-match style.

Kung-Fu Soup

Seriously though, Kaiju, which means “mysterious beast” (like Kung-Fu Soup, above) in Japanese, is a Boston-based monster-wrestling league that stages full-scale matches, contests, and tournaments. Kaiju is influenced by seizure inducing Japanese anime, World Championship Wrestling, all while paying homage to the classic guy in a rubber monster suit movies. I can’t tell you how many hours a young Cherrybomb wasted watching “Creature Double Feature” back in the day but it wasn’t enough. I could have watched that shit all day.

And, while I’m on the topic of monsters, SIFF Cinema will have two showings of the original 1954 movie, Godzilla (the version without Raymond Burr, thanks SIFF) on Sunday, February 3rd. If there is a better way to cure a hangover than watching Godzilla destroy a miniature version of Japan for 98 minutes I haven’t found it yet…

It seems that the excellent Thurston Moore (of Sonic Youth) has recorded a soundtrack for an amateur porn flick. Check the track listing below. I love track listings. I mean, these songs could be about anything. Or they could be exactly about what the title suggests. Take “The King of Sex“. I totally buy that Thurston Moore could be The King of Sex. Why couldn’t The King of Sex play guitar for Sonic Youth? Look at those eyes. That is exactly the way The King of Sex would look at you before he tells you he is not only a prolific and talented musician but also, The King of Sex. Come on…it’s not that hard to believe, is it?

Now here’s that tracklisting for “Extra Action (And Extra Hard Core):

‘The King Of Sex’
‘Pierce’
‘Scooter And Jinx’
‘Catholic’
‘Nazi’
‘Goodbye 42nd Street’

If you can’t wait for Thurston’s get it on soundtrack, check out the actual record, PornoSonic from Granpa Schlong himself, Ron Jeremy. PornoSonic has been in Cherrybomb’s collection for some time. Not that I need a 70’s porn soundtrack to help me in that department but you might. Okay, you do. Someone had to say it. Better you heard it from me.

Thanks to NME for the link.

John Galliano is an evil genius. Only in Paris could a designer debut a mens wear line that looks like Texas Chainsaw meets GWAR to rave reviews. I think the leather hood is going to be the must have accessory of the season and the absence of a nose hole is a nice touch don’t you think? I highly recommend that you see the whole 2008 collection here because it’s completely fucking insane. Below are just a few of Cherrybomb’s personal favorites…:

Galliano is a lunatic. But the boots and the jacket totally rock.

The Codpiece of the Future. Again, I totally dig the boots.

The good news is pants seem to be out this year. Besides, I don’t think anyone is gonna notice your lack of slacks when you got a helmet on your head and your body is covered with spray paint. Thank you John Galliano. I love you, you little demented Spaniard. Never change…