Scott Baio. 48 and Full of Hate. Coming soon to the Discovery Channel.
According to the Internets, former teen heart-throb Scott Baio recently tweeted some questionable comments via his Twatter after filing his taxes. What happened next will forever live on in Internet infamy as one of the most unexpected celebrity (*cough*) meltdowns of all time. Here’s exhibit A, Baio’s tweet about his taxes:
Wa! Wa! Wa! Anyway, Chachi’s “kill the poor” tweet got the attention of the website Jezebel. Jezebel posted Baio’s tweet on their site, resulting in a bunch of responses from Jezebel’s readers ranging from calling Baio a “bag of mashed assholes” to the suggestion that he might need an “empathy intervention”. Which really pissed Baio off. So naturally, he tweeted about it:
Baio then went on to play every crazy card in his deck, shooting back at Jezebel saying that he was going to “pray “for them while reminding the blog (run and written by women) that “the broom and the dustpan are in the closet”. Scott thought he was being sneaky by tweeting his barefoot-and-pregnant jive in poorly translated Italian. Chachi: FAIL! Then things got truly bananas when Baio’s wife (whom he acquired on his reality TV series, Scott Baio is 45 and Single) got into the virtual fist-fight with the following tweet:
It’s nice to see Mrs. Baio smiling in her Twitter profile picture while holding her infant daughter. It almost diffuses her use of the words “Lesbian shitasses!!!!!!” and “cuntness”. But not so much her quote that “Scott Baio has more class in his piss” than the rest of us. Anyway, as true to form as any closet hater can be, Mrs. Baio qualified her shitass statements via a follow-up tweet, defending her Freedom of Speech and also to remind everyone that she herself has “lesbian” friends who are nice and loyal. To say nothing of her other friends that come in all shapes (her one fat friend), sizes (her other, fatter friend) and colors (she has been photographed with a black woman). Phew, what a relief?
Things quickly went down the rabbit hole of no return when Renee Baio tweeted that they were forwarding the entire exchange with Jezebel to the California Attorney General (?) in the hopes of prosecuting all those involved in this latest round of online Baio bashing (the first occurred after Baio’s appearance on the Glenn Beck Show). So much for Freedom of Speech, ‘eh? Dang, Scott Baio, you really picked a winner. And while on on the subject of picking, Here’s Baio’s final word to the lesbian shitasses at Jezebel and all the other people who envy his “happy and successful life” (*cough*hack*cough*):
And to that I say, Sit on it, Scott Baio. Seriously.
But why should you buy (don’t worry, you can’t actually buy one you geek) a Disco Ball Hat when you can make one yourself? Not feeling the Disco Fever like Danny Terrio? Got some duct tape? Click here for instructions on how to make your very own Duct Tape Hat.
Custom electronic conversations hearts say what you really mean.
And I mean that from the bottom of my cold, black heart. Not because I’m a particularly bitter person but, because Valentines Day is a crappy made up day that makes you spend money on stupid crap or causes you to spend the day feeling like crap, because you don’t have someone to buy stupid crap for.
Mickey Rourke and his 24 year old niece girlfriend buying a puppy at a Manhattan pet store yesterday. For Rusty and LP.
Now before you get all mushy looking at this photo of this nice old man buying a puppy for his niece, save it. Someone needs to get Ingrid E. Newkirk of PETA some Valium and a Snuggie because this is a photo of animal rights activist and puppy mill hater Mickey Rourkebuying a puppy for his 24 year old Russian girlfriend at a Manhattan pet story yesterday. Sacrilege! Man, I know pussy will make you do all kinds of crazy things but, buying a puppy from a pet store after having a long history of canine advocacy is just too fucked up for words. Earlier this year,after posing for a PETA ad that encouraged dog owners to fix their pets, Rourke went out on his porch and shook his fist at people that purchase animals from pet stores:
I think if the public is more aware of fixing their animals, of not going to the puppy store – which I have been guilty of – they wouldn’t be putting so many dogs to death each week.
Although it pains me to type theses words, the power of “this is total bullshit!” compels me…
A Seattle Ninja impales himself on fence during a demonstration about poorly executed Ninja-y stunts that won’t make you any money. Because you’re dead and all…
A Seattle Ninja is in serious condition after getting impaled on a 5 foot metal fence when he attempted to jump over it. The Seattle PD says alcohol may have been better have been involved.
Marq Torien, deadbeat Dad and the current lead singer for the Bullet Boys. Now that’s brutal.
Marq Torien replaced original Bullet Boys vocalist Mick Sweda back in the early 90’s. He was arrested in Florida last Friday for failing to make child support payments. Let this be a lesson to you kids, Metal don’t pay. Seriously, it really doesn’t. Just ask Marq Torien.
Play “Oh No They Didn’t” Doh! Mommy’s little helper, courtesy of Play-Doh.
A Singapore ad agency created this series of print ads for Play-Doh. The ads were supposed to instill consumer confidence when it comes to Play-Doh being a completely safe toy for children. The ads contained images of everyday child-friendly items like matches, meat cleavers and razor blades, all made from Play-Doh. The ads were pulled as soon as someone from Hasbro could get the proper Mandarin translation for“WTF were you thinking Singapore??”.
Seriously. Who does this? A rightfully pissed off Moz left the stage in Liverpool, after getting pelted by a pint of beer less than ten minutes into the show. This shit is so uncalled for. I mean, this is Morrissey! If I ever had the pleasure of being in the same room as Moz and, had the unfortunate audacity to spill something (other than my own bodily fluids) on him, I would lick said liquids off of his shoes (I should be so lucky) and suck the red carpet he walked in on. Just so the the soles of the Shoes that grace the feet of Moz,wouldn’t get wet. True story.
Not only are these Sharpie DIY Halloweenmasks horrible, they are also a poor substitute for ski masks. You know, the kind a sophisticated criminal might wear if they were attempting a B&E(street for breaking and entering). Which is exactly what these two brain surgeons were doing when they were arrested last Friday night in Iowa.
Police say that Eric Brown(see Mugshot of the year above) was drunk when he got into a cab dressed in a vampire costume and makeup. When the cab made it’s way to the Interstate 75 in Cincinnati, Brown grabbed the wheel of the taxi for some unknown reason. The Imitation Meatloaf was charged with disorderly conduct while intoxicated.
Tim Eyman, Captain Dicktard. For everyone who supports the approval of R-71.
Ruling against Washington States Public Record Act, Supreme Court Justice Anthony Kennedy on Monday temporarily blocked Washington State officials from releasing the names of people seeking to overturn R-71, a referendum that would expand the current domestic partnership laws in Washington State. And Tim Eyman couldn’t be happier.
Initially, Eyman was working to keep the names of people who signed 11 different petitions, including several of his own. Yesterday, Eyman’s attorney submitted a request to include two individuals opposed to R-71 who had signed R-71 petitions and don’t want their names released. Eyman and others (especially those behind the Anti-R-71 lines) believe that disclosing the names of the 138,000 people who oppose the approval of R-71 would leave them open to harassment. Or having an uncomfortable conversation with their gay neighbors as to why they hate them so much. True story.
Mickey Rourke on the word faggot, as it pertains to football.
I’ve said some stupid-ass shit while chock full ‘O’ booze but, there are a few words that just don’t cross my lips no matter how liquored up my mouth gets. Despite being pretty sure that the use of the word faggot is required terminology in the NFL, I’m positive that Mickey Rourke knows fuck all about either topic.
With that said, I’m going to give Mickey’s drunk pie-hole a pass on this one as I’m pretty sure he won’t remember what an ass his face was last night when he wakes up. Which should be any minute since it’s about 6:00 pm in New York right now.
Last Thursday, Joe Perry finally got to meet the man he voted for in 2008, Senator John McCain. Perry was performing for the Rock Stars of Science, a conference for an org that works to increase awareness about scientific research and the health sciences. Here’s what The Perry had to say when asked if he might be considering a run for political office
Sure, if I ever find myself in that position, I could see changing things up a little. I’ve been playing rock and roll for a long time now, and if California can have actors for politicians, then maybe the rest of the country can have musicians.
The sad-old-news here is that Joe Perry is a life-long Republican. After meeting McCain, Perry had some inspiring words to say about the Senator. Sez The Perry about Johnny“That One”McCain:
I felt better about politics in general after meeting [McCain. He's a war hero, and they're the most genuine heroes. Anyone who does what [soldiers in combat] do, they’re amazing heroes. Forget about guitar heroes. It’s an overused word.
That coming from a man who used the word “hero” no less than four times just now. Never mind the guitar hero plug. Anyway, I suppose I’m not really surprised that Joe Perry is considering stepping into the political arena. Aerosmith’s blackout past is old news and Perry’s right winged political affinity would be more than advantageous to the GOP. All I know is this, I see one photo of Joe with the $63,000 dollar woman, Sarah Palin, I’m jumping off a cliff.
Estimates for yesterday’s protest in D.C. put the crowd somewhere between 20,000 – 30,000 people. A far cry from ballpark estimates of 2 million that were predicted by 912.org and conservative columnist Michelle Malkin via her TwatterTwitter.
Anyway, make sure you check back starting tomorrow (or even later today) as I’ve got a ton of stuff to lay on you that I’m sure you’ll dig. Meanwhile, I’m going to snap out of my funk by starting Happy Hour a little early today. Not only is it noon somewhere, it’s actually noon in Seattle right now. True story.
Posts will be slow today as I’m boozing working on redesigning the site. Thanks for your patience and stay tuned.
Cherrybombed.com is about the music and culture of the Pacific Northwest, as well as other cool happenings around the world. We also shine a spotlight on celebrities behaving badly. Here, you will find videos, low-brow artwork and images, and tattoos only a mother could hate.
If boozing was an olympic event, we would be on a box of Wheaties. If this all sounds familiar to you (and your mother), welcome home.
