Sears Best Triple Action Bike. $79.95.

This week’s Sears ‘74 entry, found on page #239 of the Sears 1974 Fall/Winter catalog, features the Triple Action Stationary Bike . This bizarre bike lived in my house when I was a kid. The only thing it was good at was giving you whiplash quicker than a head-on car crash. However, had I known about the bikes special  “stroke” adjustment (that allows you to vary your stroke from 1 to 28 inches, meow), I might have used it more. True story.

Mark Brooks, Playing with Dolls teaser. Inspired by Slayers 2009 release, World Painted Blood. NSFW.

This is the brand new teaser for the 20 minute film Playing with Dolls. The film, based on Slayer’s 2009 record, World Painted Blood, was created by Mark Brooks, a Slayer super fan and director of the very metal Adult Swim toon, Metalocalypse. Brooks also wrote and inked a 12 issue graphic novel inspired by songs on World Painted Blood.

A deluxe version of Slayer’s 10th studio record comes out on November 3rd.

Finally, a Miss America I can get behind.

An offshoot of hate group Focus on the Family called the Family Policy Institute of Washington recently donated $200,000 to help defeat Referendum, R-71. Family Policy Institute Board of Directors includes Pastor Joe Fuiten, leader of uber-conservative group the Positive Christian Agenda and Republican Representative Matt Shea. Before moving into politics, Shea was the head of Washington Family Foundation which is now known as the surprise! Family Policy Institute.

Washington State Voter Guides and Absentee Ballots are starting to arrive now. If you only do one thing on November 4th, make sure you vote to Approve R-71.

Freak OUT! James Kuhn does KISS. Thanks to Freddy Pants for the link.

More on the freaky face painting of Michigan artist James Kuhn here.

Via: Dlisted.

Mickey Rourke in New York. With glasses.

I don’t know what the hell is going on here, nor do I care to know.

Captain Lou Albano. For Freddy Pants.

Wrestling superstar and Cindy Lauper’s video Dad, Captain Lou Albano, passed away today in New York. He was 76. Wrestlers Rescue is accepting donations for Albano’s family to help with their massive medical expenses.

In other news, I’d like to ask the death-filled year of 2009 to consider offing members of Nickelback or Creed next time. Stop killing my childhood memories dammit!

Liquid Ass. $7.75.  For AFJ.

Liquid Ass provides a powerful stinky ass smell that can last hours. The Liquid ASS mister bottle provides a punch of instant ASS smell.

More via the Liquid Ass website.

Fucking Hipsters love their Miracle Whip a little too much.

Really, Miracle Whip?

Thanks: WOW.

Future of the Left @ Neumo’s. Tuesday, October 13th, 2009. Photo by Cherrybomb’s iPhone.

I wish this photo could have showed Andy Falkous’ bulging neck veins from last night. Anyway, Future’s show last night at Neumo’s was one of the greatest things I’ve ever seen. Then And You Will Know Us By the Trail of Dead came on stage and blew what was left of Neumo’s roof right the fuck off.

A million thanks to Dr. H for GTFO with me last night and for making sure I had a drink in my hands at all times.

More on Future of the Left, here.