Since today is Sunday, and since I know you’re too hungover (as usual) to go to church, I thought it would be fun to celebrate with a few words from God and his only begotten son, Jesus. Not from the bible of course, but from your friendly neighborhood billboard.

Screw Judas, Reason is the true enemy…

So true. I mean, everyone knows Jesus just can’t be reasoned with. Just ask Pontius Pilate. Or Judas. Or The Pharisees.

Electric Jesus eye, in the sky. It’s everywhere!

Somewhere in New Mexico, Jesus is watching you. While you wait in line to buy your porn.

Meh, I’m still not going to church.

This isn’t so much a billboard much as it is a giant redneck sticky note. The BUSH sticker to the right on the menacing looking cannon type thing is a nice touch.

Finally, a billboard that actually speaks to me.

Okay, as far as I know, Jesus hasn’t spoken to St. Valentine since he started shooting arrows into the hearts of the very people his Dad created in his own image. But what do I know, Jesus hasn’t talked to me since I posted this unflattering photo of him jamming with Mike Hucakbee. In other news, for once, I totally agree with a billboard.

I love to piss off my neighbors, does that count?

But my neighbors are Atheists. What now God?

Dickens or Darwin. Who do you believe…?

This billboard is brought to you by church going adults with a high school degree (or less) between the ages of 18 and 50. And a bunch of people from Tennessee.

Are you Asian? You can change! Truth Ministry believes in you.

Truth Ministry is all kind of fucked up just like their billboard. And mostly because the original billboard they purchased and put up in three locations in South Carolina actually read “Are you gay or lesbian and don’t want to be? There is hope for change”. The billboard above was photoshopped and plastered all over the Internet in an effort to call attention to Truth Ministry’s fucked up doctrine.

Obama who? I quit that bitch last week.

After his remarks last week that he would run for President if God told him to, Republican National Committee Chairman Michael Steele continues to make less sense than the guy yelling at you to “Repent or DIE!” around the corner from Macy’s. On CNN this weekend, Steele said he was “done” attempting to reach out to President Obama and the new administration. Steele also debunked the notion that he was, in any way, jealous of President Obama:

I’m chairman of the RNC, so, what’s your point? We both have leadership responsibilities and roles. I’m not equating the two. My point is: you are on your track. I’m on my track. You do your thing. I do my thing.

Want more proof that Michael Steele is completely out of touch? Watch this video where Steele tells Chuck D of Public Enemy that he’s just like him. A poor black kid from the projects. Yikes…