Birthday Brawl for September 22nd: Nick Cave vs. Joan Jett…

Nick Cave turns 50 today.

Could there be better timing for this edition of Cherrybomb’s Birthday Brawl? I mean, with Nick Cave being in Seattle tomorrow and Cherrybomb being in Seattle all the time and all. Anyway, Nick Cave and Joan Jett both turn the big 50 today. So off we go. The Nick Cave vs. Joan Jett Birthday Brawl is on…

Worse Drug Story:

Don’t fall asleep Nick Cave, the cowboy from The Village People might eat you.

Cave: At one particular low point of his heroin addiction, Cave wrote lyrics with a bloody syringe while traveling on the London Underground. Later, Cave resorted to dealing heroin and was subsequently thrown out of his room in a shared apartment when it became a shooting gallery.

Joan Jett turns 50 today. Despite this news, Joan Jett is not grouchy. Yet.

Jett: Joan Jett has lived a pretty clean life when it comes to the likes of drugs and alcohol. Which is pretty remarkable given the history of The Runaways. The only thing I can say about Joan Jett (when it comes to this category) is that she’s grouchy. Really grouchy. I’ve seen Jett live a few times, and personally, I think she might benefit by some sort of recreational drug interjection. The last time I saw JJ, she spent the majority of the 60 minute set complaining about the sound and her band, often stopping songs mid-stream to complain into her mike. It’s the only show I’ve ever walked out of in my life. Grouchy!

Advantage: Cave. The only time I like grouches is when I’m stoned and they are talking to me from a trash can on TV.

Cooler Tattoo Homage:

Peaches Geldof’s tattooed homage to Nick Cave’s “Into My Arms”.

Bob Geldof’s hot-mess daughter, Peaches had the lyrics of Cave’s masterful love song, Into My Arms, tattooed on her back. Apparently, Peaches‘ then boyfriend, Faris Rotter of the UK band The Horrors, is a big Nick Cave fan. So much so, that Rotter has been accused of ripping on Cave’s unique sound. But that’s another story.

Joan Jett Autograph Tattoo. Hey, at least she’s wearing panties.

There are loads of people who get celebrity autographs tattooed on their bodies. In many cases, the ink-job  of your celebrity soulmate’s face comes before you get their accompanying autograph engraved on your thigh. We should all be thankful that Joan’s #1 fan, above, went with Jett’s John Hancock only. Although, Joan Jett looking at you while you’re going downtown might be sexy. If you’re a freak that is. You freak.

Advantage: Cave. I never want to see that Joan Jett tattoo again.

Better Former Paramour:

Nick and PJ enjoy a post-coital ciggy.

Cave: PJ Harvey
When Nick Cave recruited PJ Harvey to sing the duet, Henry Lee, on his Murder Ballads record, they eneded up getting it on. Which seems about right given Cave’s affinity for raven-haired, pale skinned chicks. Much to Cherrybomb’s chagrin.

Joan Jett and Carmen Electra are just friends. With benefits.

Jett: Carmen Electra
After Carmen Electra’s divorce from Dave Navarro in 2006, it’s rumored that she got busy Jett, her long-time friend.

Advantage: Jett. Even I’ve often wanted to be PJ Harvey, but I would totally do Carmen Electra. And so would you. Don’t lie. You’re probably doing something looking at this photo right now.

Better Hair: The Then and Now Edition:

Joan Jett and her Aqua Net special circa 1980ish.

Joan’s looking a little more like Lita Ford in the photo above. Which is why she probably cut her hair off in the first place.

Joan Jett now at the 2008 Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony.

Joan’s back to black again after her recent stint as a blond. Her face looks as tight as her awesome abs these days. But I digress away from whatever it is on top of Joan Jett’s head in the photo above. Let’s just call it hair, shall we?

Nick Cave forgot to brush his hair. For like a year.

Nick Cave is always changing his hair. Whether it’s the hair on his face or his head.

Nick Cave at the MOJO Awards, 2008.

In the words of Warren Zevon, Nick’s hair is perfect.

Advantage: Cave.

Are you surprised that this Cherrybomb Birthday Brawl goes to Mr. No Pussy Blues, Nick Cave? Well, are you? Because I was totally expecting a Jett shut-out on this one. Anyway, grumpy jabs aside, I love Joan. I guess what it comes down to is this, just like a very good-looking friend of Cherrybomb, I was always more of a Lita girl. That and Nick Cave rules.

Who will be next in the Cherrybomb Birthday Brawl? Actually, I don’t know right now. I’m recovering from a nasty cold and I’m all hopped on Nyquil and coke. Which is really not as tasty as it sounds.

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2 Responses to Birthday Brawl for September 22nd: Nick Cave vs. Joan Jett…

  1. BobbyKrome1962

    Lita girl? As in Loser Ford? Lita has never had a good jam and if it wasn’t for marrying money, she’d be standing in a welfare line. Your taste is quite poor.

  2. Travis R Fuhrer

    You are so beautiful since the 1st day you started singin’. Please send me a pic so I can look at your gorgeous face every time I walk on by. You rock!!!!!!!!!!!!! You will be remembered forever. Sincerely, your rock n roll friend for life and then some…..

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