That Is Not An El Camino…
The 2010 Pontiac El Camino G8 Sport Truck
The folks at Pontiac have officially lost their minds. Because nothing could convince me that the picture above is in any way, an El Camino. Pontiac’s redux of the mythical El Camino is the latest in the ongoing bastardization of cars that were once cool. It also one-up’s Fords uncool assault on the Shelby this year.
Due out in 2010, it’s the first time since 1987 that the El Camino has been manufactured. Why does every car manufactured these days have to look 50 cents short of a Toyota Camry? And while I definitely don’t mean to imply that Pontiac has actually manufactured an El Camino, you might be asking Cherrybomb “why is the 2008 El Camino not really an El Camino?”
Because this, is an El Camino:
The Real Deal – 1970 El Camino SS
It’s rumored that a 1972 El Camino owned by Frank Sinatra sold at an East Coast auction for $50K. Mint vintage generations of the El Camino routinely sell in upwards of $25K. Cherrybomb’s friend, Frankie Laughing Gas drove a 1970′s purple El Camino. Until he crashed it into a wall while a young Cherrybomb sat in the back seat.
Those were good times.
Anyways, all I know is two things: Pontiac didn’t make no El Camino. And if Mustang decides to regurgitate a version of the 1971 Mach 1, I’m calling Frankie Laughing Gas and we’re driving into that wall again. Oh wait…they did that in 2003.
Better call Frankie.
*Editors Note: In regards to the author’s comments about the 2008 Mustang Sheby, the author is aware that the 2008 Shelby redesign was based more on the 1968 Shelby model and not the 1967 Shelby provided in this link. But that still makes the 2008 Shelby fat, and ugly. Like your mother. *
Related Cherrybombed stories:
WTF? Only a bunch of staunch Ivy league elitists could come up with the idea of taking an icon (love it or hate it the El Camino and Ranchero’s were icons) and thrust it onto the public like an unwanted 2:00 AM Cleveland Steamer from your cellmate.
At least those mutha fuckin’ innovative killing, birthright corporate whores got the ads right.
Notice how the original El Camino looks racy and edgy set against the old pavement and backdrop. It totally exudes the ability to knock the backside out of little Susie Rotten Crotch that would definitely be drawn not only to your car but to that big old Hurst shift knob.
Now look at the (hold lunch down as you say this…) Pontiac. The forgettable gray on gray like a ghost turd in a toilet bowl. Do you feel your genitalia being air brushed to nothing but smooth skin void of definition?
Fuck Detroit. It is time to admit for America to accept it. Detroit is run by overpaid corporate thieves who can’t produce anything not to mention run a company. Look at what they produce; mini vans, cars that look the same except under different badges? Even a Camry could solicit more ass than that re-tread uninspired pile of corporate yeti shit (yes there is a yeti and it is real). And to state I would rather get Camry inspired ass (AKA bland, uninteresting, unstirred, fat, flat, suburban house wife cooch) is saying something.
AFJ at his finest! I can just hear him spit out rant.